Girls, I'd like to take you back a few years to those very awkward Personal Development classes in high school. Much was discussed about the developing body, physical relationships, reproduction and even sexual health. Most of it was intriguing, some of it completely unnecessary (certainly at 13 years of age- won't go into detail here!) and for the most part it was just a whole lot of abstract knowledge that wouldn't need to be accessed for a long time to come. But it was still knowledge. Which for the most part, was better than none.
And that was it really. That was the extent of our official education on the issues pertaining to the female body. Apart from a single picture of a grown woman's anatomy (marked by fully developed breasts and broader child-bearing-ready hips), there was no real mention of the range of impacts reproduction would (or could) actually have.
Fast forward a decade or so, and here you are, 6 weeks pregnant and sick as a parrot. Or not. You immediately look bloated, like you've eaten something that doesn't agree with you all that well. Or not. By 10 weeks your bra size has more than doubled, you are quickly gaining weight on your hips, thighs and butt. Or not. 18 weeks and your bump is well and truly out there; you've moved another bra size, you're into maternity pants, and even your wedding ring is starting to get uncomfortable. Or not. 24 weeks- oh no! Could it be that those little purple lines are not veins but tears of the dermis, nasty nasty scars also known as STRETCHMARKS! Argh!!! Or not. By 30 weeks, your tummy feels stretched to capacity, and your previous 'innie' navel is now (and possibly forevermore) an 'outie', and at some angles, you look almost as pregnant from behind as you do from the front.
As your due date approaches you resign yourself to your current state of' unfit: you can't even see your lower half anymore without the aid of a mirror, your closed shoes have long been put into storage, your swollen feet preferring (dare I say it *gasp*) t-h-o-n-g-s, and you struggle to even sit upright never mind lie comfortably. Or not. Whatever your specific case may be, my guess is its closer to the former of the dual statements than the latter.
Regardless, hope is not lost. Once you birth this baby, your body will quickly bounce back to its glorious pre-pregnancy self! A little bit of exercise, healthy food choices and you'll be back in those jeans in no time.
Or so you think.
Well, your PD teacher never mentioned a third anatomy. There was no post-baby woman.
But the baby arrives (after what you could only call a near-death experience- some may put a more positive spin on it, but ultimately, its best to call a spade a spade). After some time, you get up and waddle (or crawl) into the shower, you look down and ...deep intake of breath... Where your baby bump once was is a slightly but not completely deflated sack of traumatised skin. And those thighs that had been hidden are, to put it bluntly, gi-normous!
No, it wasn't a very unkind nightmare. And no, its not all hunky-dory the next day. Days, weeks and even months pass before your body even begins to resemble your pre-pregnancy self. And not even your exact self, but a slightly modified version of you. And the modifications will be quite individual, granted. But they will be there nonetheless. Modifications you had never been told about, you'd never planned for, anticipated or invited. They appeared without your permission and in most cases, usurp your body much to your discontent.
Which brings me back to my opening point. Many of us, many of our girls, have had no real preparation for this inevitable process. They have not had the discussions, they have not been eased into the realities of these (in some cases life-altering) changes. They have had no preparation whatsoever, and consequently, end up getting a nasty shock which can and often does manifest in a variety of ways.
That's not to say there is anything wrong with these changes. On the contrary, they are completely natural and a part of our God-given role as mother. But that shouldn't equate to simply expecting to accept them after the fact. I do believe that when armed with this prior knowledge, our girls will be far more able to process the changes and ultimately be at peace with their bodies. Which can only be a good thing.
It may sound naive, it may even sound vain, but given the uber-body conscious society in which we live, I don't think its too much to ask. So, methinks its back to the drawing board for the PDHPE high school syllabus writers. And until then, mothers, please talk to your girls/sisters/girlfriends. Or talk to me :)
And that was it really. That was the extent of our official education on the issues pertaining to the female body. Apart from a single picture of a grown woman's anatomy (marked by fully developed breasts and broader child-bearing-ready hips), there was no real mention of the range of impacts reproduction would (or could) actually have.
Fast forward a decade or so, and here you are, 6 weeks pregnant and sick as a parrot. Or not. You immediately look bloated, like you've eaten something that doesn't agree with you all that well. Or not. By 10 weeks your bra size has more than doubled, you are quickly gaining weight on your hips, thighs and butt. Or not. 18 weeks and your bump is well and truly out there; you've moved another bra size, you're into maternity pants, and even your wedding ring is starting to get uncomfortable. Or not. 24 weeks- oh no! Could it be that those little purple lines are not veins but tears of the dermis, nasty nasty scars also known as STRETCHMARKS! Argh!!! Or not. By 30 weeks, your tummy feels stretched to capacity, and your previous 'innie' navel is now (and possibly forevermore) an 'outie', and at some angles, you look almost as pregnant from behind as you do from the front.
As your due date approaches you resign yourself to your current state of' unfit: you can't even see your lower half anymore without the aid of a mirror, your closed shoes have long been put into storage, your swollen feet preferring (dare I say it *gasp*) t-h-o-n-g-s, and you struggle to even sit upright never mind lie comfortably. Or not. Whatever your specific case may be, my guess is its closer to the former of the dual statements than the latter.
Regardless, hope is not lost. Once you birth this baby, your body will quickly bounce back to its glorious pre-pregnancy self! A little bit of exercise, healthy food choices and you'll be back in those jeans in no time.
Or so you think.
Well, your PD teacher never mentioned a third anatomy. There was no post-baby woman.
But the baby arrives (after what you could only call a near-death experience- some may put a more positive spin on it, but ultimately, its best to call a spade a spade). After some time, you get up and waddle (or crawl) into the shower, you look down and ...deep intake of breath... Where your baby bump once was is a slightly but not completely deflated sack of traumatised skin. And those thighs that had been hidden are, to put it bluntly, gi-normous!
No, it wasn't a very unkind nightmare. And no, its not all hunky-dory the next day. Days, weeks and even months pass before your body even begins to resemble your pre-pregnancy self. And not even your exact self, but a slightly modified version of you. And the modifications will be quite individual, granted. But they will be there nonetheless. Modifications you had never been told about, you'd never planned for, anticipated or invited. They appeared without your permission and in most cases, usurp your body much to your discontent.
Which brings me back to my opening point. Many of us, many of our girls, have had no real preparation for this inevitable process. They have not had the discussions, they have not been eased into the realities of these (in some cases life-altering) changes. They have had no preparation whatsoever, and consequently, end up getting a nasty shock which can and often does manifest in a variety of ways.
That's not to say there is anything wrong with these changes. On the contrary, they are completely natural and a part of our God-given role as mother. But that shouldn't equate to simply expecting to accept them after the fact. I do believe that when armed with this prior knowledge, our girls will be far more able to process the changes and ultimately be at peace with their bodies. Which can only be a good thing.
It may sound naive, it may even sound vain, but given the uber-body conscious society in which we live, I don't think its too much to ask. So, methinks its back to the drawing board for the PDHPE high school syllabus writers. And until then, mothers, please talk to your girls/sisters/girlfriends. Or talk to me :)
