I've got a cold sore. I only get them when I think too much or fret too much or let myself down in the 'taking care of myself' department.
Perhaps its because I've started going to the gym again, after a decade hiatus, and its so tediously boring that I end up thinking about stuff. Or maybe its because recently I've been in the company of those I can think out loud to (to some degree), initiating a spiral effect of self-inflicted-mind-abuse. Or maybe, its just that time of the month, if there really is such a thing.
Whatever the case may be, my body is responding with 'please stop or I will revolt with the revolting'. So I should perhaps listen.
I'm not helped by friends that phone with thought-provoking inquiries (as much as I do appreciate them!)
A couple of days ago, I received one such call.
A group of my friends were discussing the issue of couples sharing/knowing one another's passwords. Some found this acceptable, others not, and I was asked to weigh in on the discussion, being the married woman that I am. What was my opinion on this?
Well, what IS my opinion? Hmmm...
My answer to my friend was quite brief: it depended on the relationship, and of course, on the purpose of having the password. If it was for the express purpose of spying on your partner, then of course that is unacceptable. At least that's the opinion I now hold. Which I think is a reflection of where I am in terms of my relationship, and more importantly, where I am in terms of my own personal development.
After ending the call, I have been thinking more on this...
It really does boil down to how you see yourself, and how content and satisfied you are in your own skin. If you feel the need to keep your partner under surveillance, for whatever reason, then that speaks volumes not just about your relationship, but about your own perceptions of self. And it is only when you are happy with yourself, and confident in the knowledge that you are worthy of love, that you can let go. You can accept to accept whatever life brings. If it brings a lifetime's marital bliss, then that's wonderful, and if it doesn't, then that's okay too. Spying on your partner will not prevent marital disharmony, it will only ignite it. And if your husband or wife is looking elsewhere or wants something else, spying on them and/or catching them out won't change that.
It really does boil down to how you see yourself, and how content and satisfied you are in your own skin. If you feel the need to keep your partner under surveillance, for whatever reason, then that speaks volumes not just about your relationship, but about your own perceptions of self. And it is only when you are happy with yourself, and confident in the knowledge that you are worthy of love, that you can let go. You can accept to accept whatever life brings. If it brings a lifetime's marital bliss, then that's wonderful, and if it doesn't, then that's okay too. Spying on your partner will not prevent marital disharmony, it will only ignite it. And if your husband or wife is looking elsewhere or wants something else, spying on them and/or catching them out won't change that.
