When reflecting on my mothering practices, I have a tendency be very hard on myself. Unless I have been doing something consistently and routinely, I don't feel like I'm doing enough.
Take, for example, reading with the children. My aim has always been to read at least three books to them each day. So when I go for days without reading to them anything at all, I am overcome with feelings of mother-guilt, anxiety and inadequacy. And often, its not because I didn't want to, but because I just couldn't find the time to read three. And so rather than just do one and be content with that, I end up skipping it altogether. Shameful I know.
In hindsight, I am sometimes sensible enough to realise that its not the end of the world if things are not done religiously or to the standards that I have arbitrarily set. Because there are no hard and fast rules really, only man-made ones. That I am trying to do the right thing by them and for them as a matter of priority should be what counts. After all, actions are by intention. God knows I remind the children of that often enough. If only I could heed my own advice (well, actually, the advice of our beloved Prophet, may the peace and blessings of God be upon him).
So, in reminding myself, I will also offer you, the reader, the same. It's okay to do things only sometimes. It still counts if you do something one day and not the next or even the one after that. Surely, a content mum is better than a guilt-ridden one.
